FACTS & FIGURES
Height: 5′ 6″
Birthdate: October 31, 1988
Birthplace: Indiana
Recommended If You Wank To:
sporty babes, a young hotter Sheryl Crow, small perky breasts, intense sex
Why She is a JOYWANK Fave:
FRUITSHAKE: “Here’s her bio from IMDB.”
“Ashley attended a Catholic high school, where she was not only an honor roll student, but also the president of the art club, an editor for the high school yearbook, and the captain of both the varsity cross country and the varsity softball Jr. Olympic teams. Aiden majored in music business at college; she took night classes for music engineering and worked for a major radio station… She was nominated for an AVN Award for Best New Starlet in 2012… Aiden enjoys skydiving, bungee jumping, racing BMX bikes, and snowboarding in her spare time.”[1]https://www.imdb.com/name/nm3884847/bio?ref_=nm_ov_bio_sm
Smoothie: “One thing Aiden and I have in common is we’re both adrenaline junkies. Most people think I’m a couch potato but I rarely sit down. I don’t even sit down when I’m wanking.”
FRUITSHAKE: “You have a stand up desk?”
Smoothie: “I write at a lectern with a Blackwing pencil onto recycled sheaves of grocery bag paper.”
FRUITSHAKE: “Wow! Old School! Or maybe no school? Home schooled, were you? Anyway, I saw Aiden in a YouTube interview and she told the story of how she became a tour manager for a band she was hanging out with. She has a background in music business but I don’t anything about her musical preferences. Can I assume she is into metal bands? Seems like most porn stars prefer metal.”
Smoothie: “You’re painting with too broad of a brush. For all we know she’s the tour manager for Belle & Sebastian.”
FRUITSHAKE: “I can’t see her repping a bunch of Scottish shoe gazers. She’s LA glitter punk rock hair and death metal, I’m going to venture.”
Smoothie: “She only did girl/girl scenes for several years but now she does boy/girl and I’m happier for it. The combination of her slim athletic figure and fierce intelligence is a real turn on for me.”
FRUITSHAKE: “I want to go rollerblading with her and then have her long legs wrapped around me as I do her while she’s sitting on that lectern of yours. Followed by complimentary cocktails at a dive bar.”
Smoothie: “Which element of this fantasy could you live without? I mean, if it couldn’t all come true?”
FRUITSHAKE: “It could be a hotel bar. Hey, I read that she has no tattoos or piercings.”
Smoothie: “Remember Sweet Eddie? From college? He only had one tattoo. He had his mom’s phone number tattooed on his wrist. And he had the tattoo artist make the tattoo look like blue ballpoint pen ink.”
FRUITSHAKE: “So it didn’t look like a tattoo! Why did he do that?”
Smoothie: “He said that if he forgot that it was a tattoo and tried to wash it off then that would remind him of how much he loved his mother!”
FRUITSHAKE: “Awww. Sweet Eddie!”
“I am a completely different person when I tour. Responsible. I keep others on time… This also helps to keep me grounded. When I’m home—I’m crazy. When I’m on tour—I’m collected.”
–Aiden Ashley[2]https://avn.com/business/articles/video/interview-with-aiden-ashle-830034.html
Send me love on https://t.co/qiHHPIw3Go ✨✨? pic.twitter.com/C4mlurCenH
— Aiden Ashley (@AidenAshley) September 24, 2021
00:10 SMOOTHIE: “This is ‘Porn by Women.’ Which is great. Great to see more women directors and producers, crew, etc. But does that guarantee that this porn will be more of a turn on for women? Or at least heterosexual women?”
FRUITSHAKE: “We need Testy Louise. (makes phone call) She’s on the way.”
04:30 SMOOTHIE: “Food and sex. Tom Jones and the picnic basket. The ‘fridge in 9 1/2 Days. Can you ask Testy to check the pantry on the way up and see if there are leftovers from meetings?”
01:02 FRUITSHAKE: “She doesn’t like beets! Aiden’s character doesn’t like beets!”
01:05 SMOOTHIE: “And such phallic beets!”
TO BE CONTINUED…
